I would like to wish everyone a Happy Mother's Day today. I wish I could give my Mommy a gift today, but I will be sending her a package soon with some old family photos and a surprise! Myself.. I received a bleeding heart plant, solar lights, a gift card and flowers and a cake!
I was feeling pretty depressed and sorry for myself yesterday. I didn't go to the Mother's Day tea at church because I just didn't feel like sitting around and smiling and trying to be happy. I will go to church today and be happy there. Maybe during the sermon we can get the bigger kids outside to start the garden. I will see who is in charge of the class today and ask them. Or we can do it after during fellowship. Need to get those seeds in the ground soon!
I am having a hard time dealing with being bald. I am having a hard time dealing with only having one breast. I feel very self conscious. I try to project a positive appearance on the outside but inside I'm cringing. Not that I'm a supermodel to begin with but I don't want people to look at me and feel sorry for me. I have been getting the pity smile occasionally in public. I just smile back and go on my way. No one asks questions. I just had one lady approach me out of the blue and tell me to stop by her spa and get some cooling gel for when I start chemo! I haven't worn my wig. I feel like that will make me stand out even more. It is too tight anyhow. I am supposed to go to look good feel good at the Cancer center on Monday and I will take it with me and see if they can fix it. I'm hoping to get a prosthesis soon too. Waiting for insurance approval. Those light weight puffs don't cut it. I look lopsided! Maybe I can put a rock in it! LOL Anyhow I am trying to enjoy spring and my birds and the sunshine. Blessings to all!
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